The Twelve

I started a new ritual this year.

Let me confess: I started a lot of things this year. I got engaged, I got married. I became a stepmother. I moved from urban Brooklyn, NY, to suburban Montclair, NJ. I went from an apartment to a house. I bought new dining room furniture, hosted dinner parties, and made new friends. I cris-crossed the continent five times, attending American food festivals and speaking with enthusiastic American home cooks.

It was a big year. I also gained 6 pounds, and let me tell you something, it wasn’t easy. I earned that weight. It’ll come off next year. That’s the thing about gaining weight; it can be lost it as soon as your make up your mind to do it.

Back to the ritual: it was a table ritual. Every night, before we eat dinner, my husband, stepdaughter and I say what we’re thankful for.

Now I didn’t grow up saying grace, and I’m somewhat sheepish to admit that this tradition didn’t come from the generosity of my heart. It came from being kind of pissed off, frankly.

You see, as I transitioned from meal prep for one to meal prep for three, I recognized that it’s hard.

I like to cook; I love to cook, it’s what I do for a living. But I became vividly aware that this cooking every night thing, that which I’ve talked about professionally for over a decade, is actually as hard as it looks.

So as I was schlepping to the grocery store, and trying to find meals that would please my newfound dining companions, and cleaning and prepping and planning, I had time to think.

I thought about hard it was, sure, but then I thought about how much easier it was now, given that I didn’t have to grow my own food or stoke the fire in the fireplace to give me heat for cooking; I flipped a switch. I started to think about all the players food system that made my hard work a lot easier.

Thanks to the farmers for growing the vegetables, and the cows, fish and chickens for gracing our table. Thanks to the truck drivers, who drive our food to the grocery store, and thank you Ray who stocks the shelves at the store and is always quick to give me a sample of his favorite fruit.

I thought about my dining partners. Thank you, Aaron and Davida for inviting me to the table.

Thanks to Kayla the dog, who is not begging at the table this night for a change. Thank you for the roof over our heads, the health of our friends, family and neighbors. Thank you to the outstanding school teachers who motivate and inspire.

Thank you, new neighbors, who have welcomed me with kindness and generosity.

Thank you, my parents who threw us one heck of a wedding this year. And thank you to every last vendor who pulled out all the stops, and gave us an outdoor wedding, on the river, without a single tent. Thank you, Mother Nature, for not raining that day.

Thank you, friends and family for coming all the way to North Carolina for our wedding.

Thank you, Wiley, for publishing my first book.

Thank you, Cooking Light for giving me the opportunity to coach 12 brave people, who have made significant changes in their eating habits this year.

The best part of this new ritual is that it’s now taken a life of it’s own. Right now it’s rare that I initiate what we’re thankful for; usually my husband or stepdaughter remembers before I do. And you don’t have to do it every night (it’s not a chore), just when you’re feeling it.

Which happens more frequently than not. Because if you give yourself a second to think about what you’re thankful for, you can always come up with something. The hard thing is turning off that faucet once you get started.

Go on, try it. You’ll see.

Thank you for reading this piece, and my blog this year. I’ve enjoyed thinking about you every time I sat down to write. Thank you for inspiring me, adding your comments, and giving me the chance. Have a wonderful holiday and an exuberant New Year. 

Tonight begins Chanukah, the Jewish Festival of Lights. Unlike other Jewish holidays, where I, as a Jewish person, fast or give up leavened foods, this holiday encourage me to celebrate with one particular kind of food: fried food.

Really. That's why latkes, potato pancakes fried in oil, are the official food of Chanukah. Many people also celebrate with donuts; last year I had a party where I served latkes, donuts and fried chicken. People thought I'd completely lost my mind, but there wasn't a crumb of crispy coating left.

Why all the fried food? The story behind the holiday is that one of the great temples of the Jews was destroyed, and they had to rebuild it. But they only had enough oil in the oil lamp to last for one day. And then, miraculously, that oil lasted for 8 nights of flame, so the Jews had the time to rebuild the temple.

Which is how the Festival of Lights also became the Festival of Fried Food.

So, while health conscious Jews across the world are moaning with concern about the extra fat and calories, let's me break down some simple truths:

1. Yes, latkes are cooked in fat. No way around that. 

2. Most 3 to 4-inch latkes will run you 80-100 calories (see recipe below). Like a banana.

3. Less is more with a latke. If you've ever overeaten the latkes, you know what I mean. Two latkes should definitely be enough. After all, you need to leave room for brisket, right?

If you'd like to sample lots of latkes, I have a great idea you: Have all the latkes you want, just space it out over the 8 days of Chanukah. I have selected 8 latke recipes from CookingLight.com; here's the list with a little commentary from yours truly:

Classic Potato Latkes: If this is your first latke endeavor, start here. Look at that photo! Lacey latkes like these are a classic for a reason; enjoy with apple sauce. (shown above)

Potato-Apple Latkes, Potato-Scallion Pancakes: These recipes are one tiny, do-able step up from a basic latke. Simply add shredded apple to sweeten, or zingy scallions to give your latkes some edge. 

Mashed Potato Latkes with Zucchini and Dill: There are two camps of latke makers, those who use shredded (think: crispy edges) and those who prefer a mashed potato, coated and fried. The mashed potato latkes run the risk of becoming a "hockey puck" unless a deft hand is used for the preparation. In this recipe, the zucchini and fresh dill help lighten it right up.

Parsnip-Potato Latkes with Horseradish Cream: Parsnips are the apple of the root vegetable world. So sweet and flavorful, if you haven't tried them yet please do. And that horseradish cream adds just the right amount of bite to counter that parsnip sweetness.

Leek, Potato and Caraway Latkes with Spiced Sour Cream: Sephardic Jews (Jews that are typically from Spain, Morocco and India), like to put leeks and spices in their latkes. Sephardics are known to have some of the best recipes around, and this one is no exception.

Potato-Zucchini Skillet Pancakes with Cherry Tomato Salad: So once you've mastered the latke, have one for dinner! This skillet pancake is designed to be the base of a meal; serve it with a fried egg, or some roast brisket and you've got a special, delicious dinner treat.

Smoked Trout with Apple Horseradish Cream on Potato Pancakes: I would eat smoked trout and horseradish cream on just about anything, but I'm going to need a few moments of silence and appreciation when I enjoy it on top of a crispy potato pancake. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Cilantro-Jalapeno Latkes with Chipotle Sour Cream: I thought by now you'd be excited to experiment with something just a little bit edgy, so why not heat up the place with peppy jalapeños, cooling sour cream, and rich, spicy chipotles. This is for the latke epicure. 

So there you have it; 8 Cooking Light-approved latke recipes, averaging at 80-100 calories per latke. The only question left is: where to begin?

Happy holidays!

Have you been working on becoming a more mindful eater?  Nearly 90% of our Cooking Light community said they were trying to be more mindful (6% wasn’t sure what that even meant).  So what does mindful eating really mean? 

We asked our readers to tell us the changes they were making to be more mindful.  Here’s what they said:

• Enjoying all foods in moderation, not labeling them as “good” or “bad”
• Recognizing other reasons I eat besides hunger, such as stress or boredom
• Slowing down when I eat, savoring every bite
• Eating without any distractions
• Only eating foods that I really love

I also talked to some of the country’s leading experts on mindful eating for the 12 Healthy Habits book and here’s a sneak peek at some of their advice:

Remember how I bugged you about voting for the wonderful Gretchen Holt Witt in L’Oreal’s Women of Worth contest? The prize: $25,000 to her foundation, Cookies for Kids’ Cancer. Well, Christmas came early last Thursday night in New York City when it was announced that Gretchen won!

“It was an evening filled with many special moments and quite a few tears,” Gretchen says. “The only thing that would have made it better would have been having Liam there. He never met a party he didn't love and would have been completely in his element introducing himself to everyone who attended and hearing everyone's story.”

Even if you missed out on voting, there are still ways to help: Order cookies, the Best Bake Sale Cookbook, a Good Cookie spatula, or make a new year’s resolution to hold a bake sale in your community in 2012. The bottom line: Find a cause—any cause—that ignites your passion. And refuse to shut up about it. I’m not going to stop talking about Cookies for Kids’ Cancer until we’re all in a sugar-spiked haze. Until there’s a cure. Do it for the Gretchens and Liams in your life.

“Everyone who voted is officially a Good Cookie and part of the solution of impacting change. And I am so grateful and humbled by the support,” Gretchen says. “Together we are doing what Liam would want us to do—make it better for others.”

It's the eating time of year.

Which means we feeders are on double duty. In addition to the breakfast, lunch, dinner and snack, we're on the hook for lots of baked goods, edible gifts, and cookies for bake sales  It's easy to feel overwhelmed (and dare I say) underappreciated when you're going double-time for the holidays.

But let's face it: we choose to feed. And somewhere deep inside, we like feeding. But stepping up your game requires motivation and inspiration.

Maybe you get that motivation from your friends, your children, or your parents. I know I'm very inspired by my Aunt Chery Davis who has been known to forego her holiday feast and work at her local soup kitchen instead. For my Aunt Chery, the holidays are not about the big meal shared with the people she loves; it's about feeding people she doesn't even know.

My Aunt Chery inspires me to feed people I don't know.

My friend (and Cooking Light contributor) Tamar Haspel left her cozy writer's life in Manhattan three years ago to live (or as she says, "starve") off the land in Cape Cod, Massachusetts. It sounded like a smart idea in the summer, but for those 5 months of cold, unforgiving winter, the living is not quite as easy.

But Tamar made a commitment to an adventure, and commit she has, right down to the chicken coop, the oyster farm and the turkeys she bought one June that would become Thanksgiving dinner the following year.

These days, we're all thinking more about growing our own, for the benefit to the earth, our health, and let's face it, our wallets. Is it cost effective to raise a Thanksgiving turkey yourself? No, not if you consider the building of the pen, the plucker, and the general care and feeding that goes into it. But Tamar wasn't doing it to save a few bucks. She was looking for something else.

Tamar inspires me to cook and eat mindfully; to take a moment and consider what I eat. You can read her turkey story in her own words here.

There's another story having to do with a shared meal that I found a few weeks ago on NPR.org. Every day since I heard it, I think about it.

This one goes into the inspires me to be a more generous person category.

This is the story of Julio Diaz, a Bronx man who was mugged by a teenager on his way home from work. Something about his young mugger made Julio do something unusual: he offered the mugger his coat as well as a wallet. His act of generosity startled his mugger, who then, caught of guard, agreed to go to a local diner with his would-be-victim.

What triggered this act of exceptional kindness? Listen to the story, in Julio's own words.

This December, I challenge you to give an act of kindness. Bake a cake and throw a party for no apparent reason at the local senior center. Bake a lasagna for that neighbor you just can't stand. Give an act of food kindness this year -- in addition to the canned food drive. Do something unexpected. Maybe it's just the way you respond to a person in need in the moment; but seek out that moment; and leave your comfort zone for your act of kindness this year.

Do it for yourself, for the recipient of your generosity, and because it has tremendous power to motivate others to similar acts of generosity. This is one of those simple acts that can be far more powerful than you may realize. Whether it's a dinner you buy for a stranger, taking the time to get to know the animals and vegetables on your table, or doing your holidays differently this year to take care of others who are less fortunate.

If you're inspired to do something exceptional this year (or you know someone who has), let us know in the comments below. We'll cheer you on!

Over the last year, I have been fortunate to coach twelve Cooking Light readers toward their Healthy Habit goals.

Every single one of these readers set up a goal and moved towards it. They started somewhat cautiously -- many were worried that I'd take away their favorite treats, scold them and be generally un-fun. But that's no way to get things done. By the end of each month these coaching clients were achieving the very goal that they set out for themselves, whether that was exercising more, eating breakfast, or easing up on the salt. Every coaching client achieved their goal.

When I studied to become a coach, one of my favorite concepts was the SMART goal. I worked with each of my Healthy Habits coaching client to do this, although I kept the specifics of SMART behind the curtain in an Oz-like fashion. But now that the year is over, I am eager to spill the secret. 

Here's how SMART works. It's an acronym for Specific, Measureable, Accountable, Realistic, and Time-Bound. If you create a goal, and break it down into it's SMART goal, you can make it happen. Kristen, my final coaching client of 2011 wanted to get through Thanksgiving without over-indulging. I'll use this example to illustrate the SMART format.

Specific: Kristen wanted to not over-indulge on Thanksgiving. But having a negative goal (something to "not" do), is never a good way to start. Instead, she focused on two things: Filling half her plate with vegetables during every meal.

Measureable: You can't just say "I want to lose weight," you have to say "I want to lose X pounds." For Kristen, she wanted to fill half her plate with vegetables. That's easy enough.

Accountable: That's where I came in. She knew she'd have to report back to me. In addition, she told her whole family that she was being coached, and sent around this blog. That way, when Grandma tried to give her a huge piece of cake after she asked for a small one, there were plenty of folks around to support Kristen, and tell Grandma to back off with the portion size. As Kristen sees it, "The support is the biggest thing. I would not have been able to follow through on everything without it." 

Realistic: Did Kristen bring a frozen diet dinner and beg off on Thanksgiving? No. That would not have been realistic. But she did find that most of the vegetables had cream sauce, so she opted to fill up on shrimp cocktail instead of mountains of stuffing and mashed potato. And the next day, when her host went to the store to get some extra oil for the pancakes, she asked if she could come along. She bought enough fresh snow peas to last through breakfast and lunch, and had a plan for the day.

Time-Bound: Thanksgiving Day has 24 hours like the rest of them. Thanksgiving, plus the day after, were Kristen's focus points, and a time when so many of us over-indulge. Kristen made a specific, measureable, accountable, realistic plan that was bound to one 48 hour period.

The above example, "not overdoing it during Thanksgiving" is a relatively simple goal. But so many of us can't do it! Kristen broke it down into components so that she could. Here's a bigger goal that she's working on: losing 30 pounds by her wedding in May. But look at that; already it's specific, measureable, and time-bound (with lots of mini milestones along the way). We kicked it off together, and now she's transferring the accountability to friends and family. Is it realistic? 6 months to drop 30 pounds is absolutely realistic, and her goal weight is healthy. Plus, since we began working together she's already lost ten pounds and it's absolutely realistic that she can lose 20 pounds in the next four months. Slow, steady, realistic weight loss is the healthy way to do it.

So if there's something hard yet realistic that you want to do -- and I mean really want to do -- you know you can do it, right? You can do anything that's realistic (and more than a few things that aren't). Let us know if you have a specific goal in mind in the comments below. When you break it down into components, does it start to look even more manageable? That's the key difference between a person who talks about a goal, and a person who achieves a goal. That first step, breaking down the goal into SMART components, is critical.

I would like to thank all of my coaching clients for being courageous enough to work with me, for putting themselves out there, for doing the hard homework, and sharing their stories with all of us. You were brave to give it a try, and you are an inspiration not just because you achieved your goal, but because of how you went after it.

For the last month of the year, December, I'll be blogging about people who give back (and yes, there will be a food tie-in). I've got a few ideas, but I've got room for a few more. If you know of an exceptional person who is giving back, please tell me about them.

Thank you, as always, for taking the time to read.

Allison

I love our December challenge of being more mindful. This is a really important habit. Up until now, most of our other healthy habits have focused on what to eat. This habit is more about how you eat. A core concept of being mindful is to eat when you’re hungry, instead for other reasons such as stress, boredom, anger or anxiety. It’s a powerful tool that can change the way you think about food and how much you enjoy it. Importantly, being more mindful is what will help you make long-term changes so all of our healthy habits will stick.

Mindful eating is named after the Buddhist principle of focusing on the present. It’s an ancient concept that’s been practiced for thousands of years, yet it’s never been more relevant. Mindful eating is part of a rapidly growing non-diet movement that rejects restrictive regimens. It embraces the idea of healthy habits, not diets – and that’s what our 12 Healthy Habits program is all about.

Mindful eating is not a diet that you go on and off. It’s about creating your own personal goals for healthy eating and physical activity – realistic goals that you can stick with for life. Here are some ways you can be a more mindful eater.

• All food is good. Remove “good” and “bad” from your food vocabulary. When you label certain foods as “bad” you’ll feel bad about yourself when you eat them. If you get rid of moralistic language around food it becomes less stressful.
• No foods are forbidden. The more you try to avoid certain foods, the more power they gain over you.  When you know you can enjoy those “forbidden foods” when you want, the urgency to eat them in large amounts will eventually diminish.
• Say goodbye to guilt. If you’re in the habit of judging food, you also tend to judge yourself by what you ate.  That means it’s hard for you to fully enjoy certain foods because you feel guilty when you eat them. Ironically, it’s this guilt that often leads to more overeating, not less.  
• Do not punish or judge yourself if you overate. Instead, remember what it feels like to be overly full and then work on new strategies to decrease the likelihood that you’ll eat more than you intended next time.
• You are the expert. Instead of following rigid rules created by someone else (including the latest popular diet), rely on your own instincts. You are the best person to decide how to meet your needs, including when, what and how much to eat based on your body’s cues of hunger and fullness.

Are you trying to be a more mindful eater?  Tell us how you are changing how you eat.

How are you doing with our November Healthy Habit of being more portion aware?  We're collecting lots of great tips from our Cooking Light community on how they keep portions in check, which will be featured in the upcoming Healthy Habits book. We also tapped several leading nutrition experts to tell us their thoughts about managing portions. Here's a sneak peek at what a few of them had to say...

Jill Castle, MS, RD, pediatric nutritionist and blogger, Just the Right Byte

"When eating out, be aware of words that warn of portion distortion -- value meal, combo, ultimate, tub, supreme, biggie, deluxe and super size.  It may be tempting to think more is better, but in this case, more is calories."

New York University's Lisa Young, PhD, RD, author of The Portion Teller Plan and one  of the country's leading experts on portion control

"People eat in units -- one bagel, one muffin, one soda or one steak -- and they don't really pay attention to how big that unit is. Just because you're eating one of something, it doesn't mean that's the appropriate amount of food you should be eating."

Michelle May, MD, mindful eating expert, blogger and author of Eat What You Love, Love What You Eat

"Once you have the amount of food you think you'll need, physically divide it in half on your plate to remind yourself to stop half way and check in again. This little 'speed bump' will slow you down so you can reconnect with your hunger and fullness level."

Marsha Hudnall, MS, RD, blogger, A Weight Lifted

"Think of portion sizes as a place to start.  It builds in an automatic stopping place that gives you the opportunity to think if you really want more.  Then pay attention to your internal hunger cues.  If you decide you want more, that's fine to have a second helping. But you're making a conscious decision rather than just eating all that's on your plate.

Manuel Villacorta, MS, RD, blogger, Eating Free

"Popular diets tend to demonize certain foods like potatoes, pasta, cheese and even fruit, yet the reality is no food is fattening unless you over consume it.  Food is not the problem, your portions are.  I think it's important to eat with pleasure and without guilt. Just keep sight of how much you're eating."

I especially liked Manuel's message that no food is fattening unless you over consume it.  It really all comes down to portions.  You can enjoy all foods as long as you're not over-doing it.  One way to keep tabs on your portions is to write down what you eat, at least for a few days.  It can be a real eye-opener.  Many of our readers said they rely on mobile apps to help do the tracking.  What about you?  Have you found some tricks to help you manage your portions?  Let us know what works for you!

By: Jennifer Chinn

I’ll have to admit, I had a big advantage when starting to incorporate Cooking Light’s portion control advice into my life. My husband, Mark, went out of town for work for two weeks. I got to experiment without having to worry about anyone else’s eating habits influencing me.

I already use salad-sized plates for meals, but I never considered applying this concept to glasses. It is apple cider season in Michigan, and there is nothing like fresh-pressed cider from our local cider mill. Our regular drinking glasses probably fit four or five “portions,” and it is so sad to just pour a little bit at the bottom. I pulled out some pretty little juice glasses, and they are now dedicated to cider. Not only are the portions controlled, these glasses are special because my mother gave them to me from when my sisters and I were kids, so I am happy to have a reason to use them more often. Now I just need to find a fun (small) ice cream dish. 

I’ve discovered the “slice meats” tip doesn’t just apply to meat. I tried it with a homemade individual pizza, cutting it into a lot of bite-sized pieces instead of just a few slices and spreading them out on a plate. It takes longer to eat so I enjoy it more.

My favorite tip has turned out to be “eat before you eat.” To make this happen, I make sure to always have lettuce and raw veggies chopped and ready to go. Otherwise it would be easy to come home at night, decide I am too tired to do the prep and skip the salad. It works!

Once Mark was back, I was in the habit of having a salad before the main course. Now I can eat salad while he has one portion then have my portion while he has a second. Since he has a physically active job, two portions are appropriate for him, but not for me. I find I am not “jealous” that he gets to eat more because we are eating for the same amount of time. Therefore, I feel satisfied with the appropriate portion.

Between those salads and the “freebie foods” tip, I am eating more fruits and vegetables than ever. Mark and I enjoy tandem bicycling and just competed in a 30-mile mountain bike race. I felt stronger and faster during the race, plus recovered better, than I had all summer. I think those veggies had a lot to do with it. Talk about inspiration to continue!

Looking back over the past few weeks, it is obvious that portion control, at least for me, is more of a mental challenge than anything else. I found I enjoyed being “in control” of my portions so much that it inspired me to find an app for my phone to track what I was eating. I figured if I was eating the correct portions, I might as well go the next step to be in control of my whole day. So far, so good!

Kristen, like so many of us who are trying to be portion aware this month, is a wee bit concerned about the holiday obstacle course in the six weeks ahead.

Here are five ideas that she’ll use to help navigate Thanksgiving. If you’re worried about your holiday intake, try these solutions:

Challenge: Friends and Relatives who want you to eat more of the foods you don’t want, and insist “It’s a special occasion!”, “Just this once?”, or “What’s the big deal?”

Solution: Since Kristen is getting married in May, she has an easy out: she bought a dress that she needs to fit into in a few months. She can respond with a simple, “I’m getting married and I’ve got a goal so no thank you, but enjoy it for me!”

For those of us who aren’t getting married, and for those times where a “No, thank you!” just doesn’t put an end to the badgering, consider why this is important to the person who is pushing the issue. Are they looking for an excuse to overindulge, and are looking for your “permission”? Or are they rapid-metabolism Ritas who just don’t understand what you’re trying to do? Have a little empathy instead of letting the calorie pushers get your goat.

Challenge: How can I be sure to fill up on the right things, and not the stuffing, gravies, and mashed potatoes?

Solution: Kristen plans to fill two plates worth of food. Her first trip to the Thanksgiving buffet will be to fill up on salad and vegetables.  Once she’s done, she’ll have a glass of water, relax, then take another trip for the more caloric stuff.

Challenge: I don’t want to bring out my measuring cups and measure everything; how can I make sure I don’t overdo on portions?

Solution: Instead of a traditional dinner plate, use a salad plate and fill it once. There are so many delicious foods at Thanksgiving, dinner plates are often towering with food. Don’t have a sparse, sad plate, just use a smaller one!

Challenge: My family loves to wear their Thanksgiving pants. They are big and roomy, and built to expand. I don’t feel as full when I wear clothes like this. 

Solution: So don’t wear clothes like that! Wear a tight-fitting dress or pants and you’ll think twice about indulging. Or, wear control-top nylons or Spanx under your clothes. Not only will you look better, you’ll be less likely to overdo.

Challenge: There is nothing healthy at my family’s Thanksgiving. Absolutely nothing. It’s all pies and starches, and every vegetable is swimming in a butter sauce. Should I just eat before I get there? 

Solution: Gosh, no! That’s no fun, and somewhat insulting to the host. Be a good guest and BYOV, that's right, bring your own vegetables. A crudite platter is always a welcomed appetizer, and so is a side of brussels sprouts or roast butternut squash. If you want some vegetables, bring them!

I wish everyone a happy and healthy Thanksgiving. Let's be thankful for our friends, family and the fact that so many of us are faced with the challenge of abundance this weekend.

See More: 5 Vegetable Recipes for Thanksgiving